new semester new chapter

uitm opening soon. why oh why am i not excited at all? for 3 years in melaka i prayed hard to get the hell out of there to be nearer to home. now that the time come. things doesnt look as pretty as i imagine it to be. not forgetting that a lot of things had gone wrong in the process of going there. why do i have a very bad feeling about that place.

nevertheless. i'll keep my fingers cross with hope that everything will turnout great. insyaallah.

most of my friends are struggling to register for ptptn loan online.. thinking about it. i am very grateful to have all the privileges that i have now

being flirty with every guy you know is normal for you. but not for me thou.

am no angel. but that is my way. flirtatious only to my boyfriend. that is me

abah

abah

i am thankful

to be raised by such a wonderful dad.

being a single father wasnt easy.

i know it wasnt

u were tired. all the time.

but being a wonderful person that you are,

u managed. to suceed in ur job as well as a father

i made the right decision when i choose you.

when there was just the 2 of us.

life was great.

we had our weekend tour.

to places. motor shows. museums. galleries.

u showed me world before its time

u taught me life.

and then came umi.

i accepted her. tho it was easy at first.

but as time flies.

she was great. she taught me womanhood.

she accepted me like her own.

oh how lucky i am.

there were times. when i hate you

there were times. when im scared of you

there were times. when i wanna be away from you

but the feelings lasted only for a few seconds.

and then i realise. u did what u did cuz u love me more than ur self. u have huge ego. no doubt you do. everyone knows that. u never tell me that you love me. but u did and you gave me everything i need.

u taught me how to be tough. you taught me how to survive world. you taught me how to be realistic in life.

back then,

i used to love car rides with you. our father-daughter moments that i realy cherished. the 'who puts on the seatbelt first race'. that was cute when i think about it now. u let me win sumtimes. most of the times you wont. u even create a winning song for it. haha. i hated it. but i miss it now.

you taught me a lott of things that books doesnt. u prepared me with the right education and knowledge as soon as i reached 18. and im greatful cause what you taught me become handy now in life.

abah,

i know i have dissapoint u a lot of times.

i know im not exactly the kind who makes you proud

i know we have spent less and less time together but im still thankful that you could understand why.

nonetheless. you still manage to fulfill all my needs. im sory abah.

for not being there much.

but im trying. to be a better person. for you.

thank you. for all the hardwork, money, time that you have spent for me. i love you abah. i really couldnot imagine my life without you.

ya allah.

tolong aku. aku mahu taat pada mu.

ya allah

tolong aku. aku mahu lari dari kemurkaanmu

ya allah.

bantu aku. untuk mengislamkan semula diriku

ya allah

bantu aku. kuatkan iman ku pada mu

aku tahu aku penuh dosa

aku tahu aku tidak beriman

tapi aku mahu cuba

aku mahu ya allah

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